Aitah for minimizing contact with my parents because they allow my brother to stay with them. Able to go wherever they want in the house.
I did not come forward or press charges until I was 21, when I learned that he was abusing someone else. Growing up I (f 29) always felt like a burden as my parents seemed to focus on Tina (f 32) or Milly (f 27). They have grossly abused you - they have failed to get you medical assistance, they have punished you for needing medical assistance, and they have blamed you for their own medical problems. You are 100% correct to cut contact with them if your family dynamic is as dysfunctional as it sounds. I was so confused. A 9 month old baby doesn’t have the right to have a vendetta against her father for an affair that happened when she was 9 months old. I really don't know how to start this. Reply. Say this to your mother. Because just because you're going no contact with them. YTA. So when we found out that er were having a son, she went nuts because that was my wife’s parents first biological grand son. my parents were always screaming, fighting, even cursing at each other saying horrible things , dad getting kicked out, breaking dishes ext. During this time, the older son disclosed that his father had sexually assaulted him, my "cousin-in-law" denied that anything happened. AITA for not allowing my brother to come to our Grandmother's Thanksgiving dinner. Cutest little tuxedo cat with the personality to follow. This is as much a loss to you as a death in the family. I (M31) told my sister (F30) that I will not be attending her wedding. It’s their home but it was the double standard for me. After that I started trying to collect my thoughts and arranging a meeting with my father to discuss the things that were bothering me; why did he abandon me, why did he think he could just reappear into my life like that, that I wasn't going to move in with them and I didn't consider them my parents because they never acted as such, etc I talked to my brother on the phone, and he told me how she felt about us. Me andy wife have been to every single game 1K votes, 141 comments. true. My parents were pretty upset about it when it happened [in Latin America, usually unmarried children stay at their parents house until they marry]. noonecaresat805. And you for shit have not earned it. If you were going to sell your ass for 10 grand. If they don’t want to charge him rent that’s fine that’s their decision. My brother and sister in law have been avoiding and ignoring my wife and we dont know why. . AITAH for telling my sister that I will not be attending her wedding. However, now that my brother's in my care, we have discovered how much we have wanted to be in each other's lives. If possible, you should try to live independently and self sufficiently as soon as possible because from what it sounds like you’re brother could easily worm his way back into living at the house or getting you’re mom on his side for things. This year, my husband's family has decided to have Christmas at his parents' house on the 23rd. Stay for the kids; leave for the kids. My parents told me that I would need to move out of the basement suite in the house and into my mom’s hobby room while my brother and his family stay with them. They were sorry for us and said it was a shame, but they were also very Catholic and basically shrugged their shoulders about it because technically my dad was still married. It could still be the grandparent's decision to take them along. He’s all over my son, myself, coughing on the food. AITA for throwing my brother an end of alimony party. Suddenly, I could feel my newfound freedom, that I’ve waited over 40 years to claim, slipping through my fingers. I am not very social, and I prefer her company to most people I know. Remind them that by "giving" 1/2 million worth of equity to your brother, they are taking it out of their retirement portfolio. Instead of learning from her upbringing, she and her brothers use this as an excuse. This is a long story so I will attempt to keep it short and simple. Then here we all go to meet up with my older sister, my mother her husband & in-laws. He has lived with us a year now. St Tell your parents you truly are trying your best and you want them to try hard to be better parents to you and your brother. So would AITA if I just cut contact with my brother and his family permanently? He takes no responsibility himself, and yet has the audacity to tear into you for handling it how you see fit. My brother has him over a lot. We have a tradition of having Sunday family dinners every week, which everyone looks forward to. As you can imagine, I was absolutely shellshocked. But I'm completely estranged from my father and his whole side of the family, and see my half-brother--the child of my father's affair--with reasonable regularity. People try their best for all reasons above and refuse to try their best for the same reasons. Since she left, it's just been her and the kids living together. Hi so I’ve been saving to put a down payment down on a house in Brooklyn . If you allow your parents around your child, they absolutely WILL allow others to mistreat them. She didn’t defend you or shield you from your abusive and controlling father. My brother also says them. Now, my brother considers himself a jokester, and it was funny when we were kids, but in my opinion it’s AITAH for going no contact with my entire family? Tl;dr: I fled across the country because my decade older brother raped me for years, and my parents did not support me or keep him away from me when they found out. Tina because she was the oldest and the one they go through all of the 'firsts' with (e. I’m livid they came with his he was. OP's parents more or less have 50% custody of those kids so it's not about them wanting more time with them. I had a convo with my parents in 2022 about it & they said that if he didn’t stop they wouldn’t allow him over. I might still have just shrugged it off and dealt with it until we found out that MY husband's family (parents and unmarried sister) are invited to my brother's wedding as well. A few years ago my dad and stepmom moved to a different state to take care of family and asked me if I would like to take over their house until they come back. So i decided that i'm not going to the wedding, me and my bf are going on a trip for the weekend, not to be petty or anything we're just going to enjoy Careful-Mouse-7429. My mom talked to him about it but he didn’t understand. 1. Throw away because of personal information on main. Ever. However, forgetting your actions and allowing you back in my life or around my children, I cannot do, as I refuse to have any one of my children go through what I did growing up” ”I pray that you did get sober, and will continue to remain sober. I can't believe parents would do this to their children. He called me a brat and said that my brother would never say something this awful. And when your brother has a child they will absolutely favor that child and mistreat theirs as they mistreat you. It's tough, but it can be done. This feels like my response to when my parents asked me if I wanted a little brother or sister when they were pregnant with what would become my sister. For a long time I was lost and did not think I was going to find anyone. My parents did not do put it into a 529 plan, my father created an investment account that was in his name but intended for me. My brother and his son Eli (9) recently got evicted because my brother lost his job. This all happened about 2 years ago they started avoiding my wife, we all lived in my parents basement, because the housing market sky rocketed after covid. They are not happy about me calling them out for how they treated me vs. I can see where OP's confusion came from, if it looks like someone is starting the adoption process you don't expect to just be informed that they've adopted someone. We got there before them. I’m so sorry for what you went through; no one should ever have to put up with the kind of abuse you endured from your “family”. Hope this helps and stay strong. He rarely spoke to me,my dad and my step mum. They talked to me. Everyone received flowers but me. My husband has 3 adult daughters who barely speak to me when we get together, and his parents and sister are still friends with his ex-wife. They might want the kids to have the experience. She’s now in a relationship with him. I feel like they will regret leaving their parents and not seeing them often. Tell your parents that they are free to fuck this dude to clear their little boy’s debt. NTA. Before i start let me say we didn't spoil our son and never abused or neglected him in anyway. My dad's side of the family, two uncles, one aunt and his parents, my grandma and grandpa. Me, my husband my brother and nephew took over the house and the mortgage payment, but she refused to My one sister-in-law, who had two sons from previous relationships, had huge issues with her kids being excepted into the family. We were living with my parents at the time, which by extension means we were living with my brother who, for all I could tell, absolutely loved hanging out with my wife! Hell I thought everyone did, until my mother suddenly called me for an ‘intervention’ that threw my whole life upside down. Minutes later my brother comes to me and is like “you have $500 to give them but not $100 for me?”. I (26f) moved to a new state about a year ago to live with my husband (24m). my dad left before my brother was born. The rest who didn’t shun us were cold to me. when i got into secondary school he changed how he Only months after we got engaged did my mother allow him to sleep in the spare room. First of all your Aunt is TA. Please go completely NC with all of them and if you haven’t already, get some therapy for the mourning process. She had a bad childhood which is unfortunate. Once your older and the sexual element of the marriage wanes, they become friends and financial supporters. Last I was told total amount was around ADMIN MOD. I'm an adult who's raising my own children. My brother and his wife gave my parents a ride to my aunts house (2 hours from where we live). Bridal party always walks in together regardless of their marital/ engaged/BF/GF etc status, Just ask someone else to be a groomsman and brother can sit it out with his fiancé. AITAH for choosing my sister over my daughter? My ex wife (33F) and I (34M) finalized our divorce last year. You have also been abused and need help working through those emotions and what your sister just told you. So I asked my grandparents if I could live with them, and they said I could stay anytime. I’m pretty upset right now. ); Milly because of her disability and being the baby of the family. I gave my parents a copy of my keys, only to be used for emergencies. It’s time to cut contact with all of them. I have never said anything like that to them before and they are upset I was disrespectful to them. I love my parents and they have been struggling so much with this situation. I (17F) live with my parents ( 51 F) (58M) we were never really a family, the house was never quite . My older brother and his ex had a rocky marriage before they finally divorced. The mother also denied it, but my parents ended the friendship. St It depends on them depends if they actually love you how much they actually love you if they can get over their feelings that this is not what they wanted for their child or it’s not what they believe in or anything like that so just be yourself you can be upset and if you feel you need to contact you can do so I know a lot of people who have A few weeks ago I(20f) cut all contact with my brother (21m). He can fuck his buddy himself. We “let people help us” because it “benefits us” but we don’t give back. I (26M) have recently gone 0 contact with my immediate family because of my 16 year old brothers racist and sexist language that my parents don’t do anything about. She has been my best friend since I graduated university. Before my sister met her current fiancé she was in a relationship with my best friend (M31). AITAH for cutting off my parents because they stole thousands of dollars from me. Nta. first to get a job, first to graduate, etc. Seems like a DNA test is warranted, since obviously your sister COULD be his daughter too. I had to wait until 25 to have my fiancé stay at my house when my brothers She’s now 10 and despite them living 300 miles away they want to have her come and stay with them for a week during the school holidays. Jake and your parents are NC - and then you go ballistic at Jake. AdamVoorhees. Not the first time he told me that. They were the ones who said in court that I was more emotionally mature than either parent. Talk more, fight less as a family. They lived with their dad the previous school year due to a house fire and my fiance They think because, they managed to get through and end up as room mates, then you should too. We also have a co parenting arrangement for our daughter (14F). Beneficial-Eye4578. AITAH for saying I wouldn’t allow my brother and his kids live with me when I buy my house. I had dinner with my family a week ago. Also, they are not safe to be around. Ps: sorry for the bad grammar, English isn't my first language. Mar 24, 2024 · Welcome to our Favourite Stories YouTube channel! Join us as we delve into captivating narratives, intriguing questions, and thought-provoking commentary. It’s like a death, except they are still around. At this point, we have shared a bed before. I had to wait until 25 to have my fiancé stay at my house when my brothers could have whoever they wanted from 16. AITAH For telling my family to piss off because they won't accept my fiance. You don’t need that kind of negativity and pushback for something they refuse to do themselves. I’ll be honest, I have no reason not to let her go other than the fact I resent them for depriving me and my sister of a better life even though they had the means to do so. Completely. If you decide to go to contact, just understand that you are choosing to limit your interaction with other people. My wife and I have a daughter Naomi (12). My only hesitation with this suggestion is I know my mom will be extremely upset if I choose not to come because my brother is. I have had boyfriends and even a short relationship that ended amicably. Next he asks you for forgiveness, respond back that “I have forgiven you, as I choose not to live in anger over you another day. My response was "A pony". This is what you should tell your mother. We are 10 years apart in age. I'd hope he would do the same to me. Long story short, she was having an emotional affair with a guy at work. Last I was told total amount was around AITA for avoiding my parents because i can't stand them anymore. You share DNA, that’s it. You give in to your brother’s fiancé now and you will be on the back foot with her all your life. Oh I wouldn't say that she turned my family against me, so far I have only gotten a call from my uncle saying that he does feel sorry for me, he offered to give me 3k from his own money but I refused saying that he isnt responsible for what my parents did and as for the rest of the family they didn't contact me, either thry dont want to or You have to separate yourself from them for your own good OP. I had to house Kylo with my parents until my husband and I can afford to Eventually, I took him to court because I wanted my education, dammit, and part of that involved having a guardian ad litem appointed. The rest of the family was horrified over what my parents did, and some of them cut my parents out, and by extension me and my siblings. We “gatekeep resources. My parents never did so I don't think they should get to see me get the award. Lo and behold I meet a lovely beautiful kind woman at a Barnes and Noble. Dec 24, 2023 · Ho, calm down. This issue she made up in her head because they were excepted. Don’t feel as if you have some magical bond tied to these people. Long story short, I 22 (F) fled across the country from my family last December, about a week before Christmas. People always think they HAVE to help a family member because “they’re family”. I’m 30 (F), I moved out of my parent’s house about 2 1/2 years ago. I'm (29M) worried about my little brother James (18M) because of the way my parents treat him. ” You have that, and rest assured that it will eat away at your egg incubator for the rest of her life. NAH. My little mind couldn’t comprehend that *I* was now Maria, to me, that was my big sister. my brother. Absolutely! I had a bf who didn’t even try to help my daughter get me a card, make me a card or buy a token gift. My mother was sobbing, and my dad was red About a week ago my mom called me and told me that the invitations were sent out that day and asked if i got mine, because my brother's gf was supposed to give them to my bf since they work at the same company, I said no and she was very irritated. My brother then let us know that he doesn't care if we don't attend but my grand- parents told him if he doesn't invite me they're also not going and that's the only reason they want me there. Dachshundmom5. In that case you must assume that she agrees with him, and if that’s how they feel about you, then they don’t deserve you. Yeah YTA, and your mum is an AH and a hopeless mother and your dad is an abusive AH. ADMIN MOD. Am I the jerk for wanting to leave my house and live with them? edit:also, my mom is a single mom. I would feel terrible for adding to their pain. They've had free reign of the house. As is your child. I'm so sorry for all of you. Your mother, instead of sticking up for her son, sided with your dad and Jake into not pressing charges. The first 15 minutes into dinner my parents asked me for $250k so they could downsize and buy a house (retired). While I want to be happy for them, there's a significant issue: I don't get along with Lisa at all. If you are parents neglect you fine you can neglect them and be silent. For a little context I 23 male was always the disappointment child my younger sister 20 F Gigi was always the favorite as soon as she was born, My parents (Julia) 46F (Harris) 48M always favored Gigi as she was a girl and a week before Gigi was born my grandmother Giana passed away so my mum named her Gigi in honor of my grandmother. I don't see why you have to split the family but at the same time. AITAH for refusing my parents their grandchildren cause they killed my cat. First I don’t have that amount of cash lying NTA. My parents want to move close to the prison so they can visit him every week. MOD. Fast foward 3 years we're engaged. Reply reply. Growing up, my parents were really good friends with a family from church. Because his income was several times of hers, the court awarded her alimony. There’s a really supportive FB group for people who’ve gone NC with family. I'd sooner shoot my brother in the head than allow him to hurt my kids. AITAH for not wanting anything to do with my son. When we were moving me down, I had a cat named Kylo. People’s parents get divorced all the time. NTA, absolutely not!! First, go to the counselors at school and set up some sessions. Only months after we got engaged did my mother allow him to sleep in the spare room. Tell your brother to stop acting like your pimp. We were engaged by the time they let him. " My (36m) fiance (34f) has four kids ages 6-16. Able to go wherever they want in the house. It was a sizable amount. Hey OP, your not in the wrong, I understand it’s very challenging to cut contact with family members, especially parents , but what is the point of maintaining relationships that hurt or harm you. They were so great. I have a dog that I love. Denied my parents $250k. I (F27) lived with my parents until last week. To be honest, there were enough faults on both of their parts so no one can claim the high ground. Your parents can and should honor they child they lost, but never at the expense or exclusion of the child they have left. Your potential future SIL will be a thorn in your side forever. There you go, buddy. If your brother wants the debt forgiven. Mother, father, 2 sons, 2 daughters. My daughter freaked out, said they will never leave, and if they do it’ll be because I had to help them get approved for a lease and help with down-payments/ security deposit etc. Respect is earned not given. Ella threatened a restraining order because my brother can't handle rejection, so you can imagine how that works when they live next door. i still talk to our bio mum but he doesn’t. They say letters and phone calls aren't enough to replace weekly ImpressiveDepth912. Encourage your sister to do the same. NSFW. Your post title is confusing, OP, let me fix it for you: AITAH for perpetuating the bigotry of my parents by disinheriting my own son because of his sexual orientation, despite the fact that it is not something he chose for himself, or has any control over. My wife and I moved out into a downstairs apartment when we first got married but had major issues OP, you can have a relationship with your half-sisters without your Mom and John. To give some background info, my brother and I were taken into fostercare when I was 4 months old because of a super neglectful situation. But if I'm honest, he's very immature for his age. And if you were 9 months old at the time, you have no right to bitch. I'm a 34 y/o white male and my soon to be wife is a 29 y/o black female. My mom avoided me on Easter, and both of my parents said very awful things about my boyfriend throughout this last year. We were adopted a few months after that, and through the years my adoptive parents adopted our three other siblings as well. My mistake, I have about 25 years of regret that I settled for friendship instead of having someone in love with me, as I was in them. Since he graduated in May, he's done nothing but stay in his room, gaming almost nonstop. Dec 24, 2023 · The admission of all this is oddly feeling like an intentional desire to push me back into NC since working out relationships is hard. It was to celebrate my younger sister for getting into a medical fellowship. My daughter is very close to her mom, and she They entered with completely somber faces and sat down and my father started with: We thought to let you live here for 10 years more but after you insulted us so bad, that offer is not valid anymore, you can move out with first opp you have" They continued with completely crazy rant that they cried for days after we insulted them and they This is researched and documented. You would be keeping the 10 grand and not gifting it to your brother. Tell everyone, tell them they supported your brother because one gay kid apparently didn't say they were bad parents or did something wrong because they apparently had one 'good' one. It started when I was 6 and he was 17, and continued until I was 11 and he was 22. I found out about all of this. And then he talks about how me and my older sister, is selfish. If been hard saving and skipping night outs etc but I’ve always wanted to have something in my name so that later in life it will pay off. I (26F) refuse to forgive my parents (Dad & Step Mother) for their affair even though all of my siblings choose to forget about it. AITAH for going no contact with my sister and my parents until they can prove she is taking accountability for her abuse and the damage it causes? Even if it means my kids don’t see their grandparents who they are close to and I lose the help. They don’t say it around me but the fact that they say it at all makes me uncomfortable & feel unsafe. Whatever, whatever. I'm a 20-year-old woman with a big, close-knit family. She does just enough “loving things” for her family so she doesn’t have to take responsibility for her vile actions. Tldr: my mother doesn't parent my autistic brother AITA Because I made my parents homeless for getting rid of my dog. They have put up with a lot of abuse from my brother for the sake of the grandchildren. Should have let him get arrested. My wife and I took them in because we have more room in our house than my aging parents have in their condo. They did not think I was going to use it, and my brother's wife was diagnosed with MS and can no longer work so they gave my brother my college fund. Then, go LC with your sleezy parents. And, make it clear that what they are doing is infantilism and cruel. Her parents are apparently furious and mine decided to ask the priest at our local church for his opinion, since he disagreed with their behavior and they're very religious, they've backed down a bit broomandkettle. Blast them, because fuck them. As time went on, I no longer could handle how they treated my boyfriend, and I had been in therapy for my Ugh. When they arrives we find out my nephew is sick - had a fever of 102 last night, is coughing, and has a runny nose. ADMIN. My little brother was 9 years old, and while I tried to have a relationship with him in the last 10 years, it is essentially been non-existent. Recently, my older brother, Mike, got engaged to his fiancée, Lisa. If you have any relatives who very much dislike your parents, you might (cautiously) connect with them to see if they are able to give you emotional support. I didn’t even get flowers. I (29) was abused by my older brother (40) as a child. There are people out there that take their family members to court for petty reason, physically abuse or do worse to their own “family”. You are the family scapegoat. However, not long after. They wanted us to stay the night in August but stay in separate houses. Basically our son 27M just cut us off out of nowhere. Also, I said I don’t mind the rules they have. 2. So you could imagine my anger and frustration when my parents informed me THE NIGHT BEFORE that they would like me home at 9 instead of 11 due to concerns of traffic and my ability to safely get home (I live abt 2 hours from the parks and would have to drop my gf off so we could leave at 9 to be home by 11) and my ability to preform at work the TW:SH i know it sounds like yes but what happened was when me and my brother were little we were really close but when he went into secondary school he stayed in our joint room alot and never came out. He's a pretty smart guy. So, figure a spouse starts cheating 7 yrs into a marriage, add another 13 years and they’re at 20 yrs before the breakup. Welcome to our Favourite Stories YouTube channel! Join us as we delve into captivating narratives, intriguing questions, and thought-provoking commentary. She's been pretty much a single mom since she left her ex years ago. For a little bit of back story my brother is 16 years old and is ADHD (this will be relevant later) and has a horrible sense of humour and views on women, queer people and people ADMIN MOD. My bf sitting there with us & Im the ONLY person without flowers or a gift. I did not agree and they said it If both sides can just be quiet and respectful about their dislike for the other. She will never admit, I firmly believe couples should get to dictate what they want for their wedding, but was hurt because my daughter is the only niece or nephew not invited. I said that Jhonny was a baby when he passed, and they had no idea what he would or would not say because they didn’t know him and that I hated him and them for always comparing me to their stupid made-up ghost of him. •. The number of people I've seen in this thread and the original that had parents that didn't believe them makes me sick. There’s a phrase in English, “Living well is the best revenge. Your brother and his wife can fck off from your life. Also my grandparents live here, they are getting older and my parents are only children. Your parents need to act like they value you, or you don't need to value them. Hopefully they won't need it later, but remind them that if they do, they need to go to your brother and not you. My birthday is Dec 23, (which is bad enough already, I know). Their house is a large part of their retirement "equity". It's about her sister being a dick and taking advantage of op and her parents. They might have talked to my parents - I think so. Your father Jake. NTA, make it clear to your parents that under no circumstance will you take your brother in. They might have to do that again. When it came to everything else, it was my brother who was the one talking to my parents (yes, I still talk to my folks about my life regardless because I have a great relationship with them) and telling them "his wife feels this way and wants to be treated better. That's mainly because my parents (50M and 51F) spoil the ever loving crap out of him. At my mothers house, we were not allowed to ever sleep in the same bed. Furthermore, if your father is paying support for your sister and contests it at this point the courts may order a DNA test be conducted. Also, you probably need a new therapist. They don't have to as well. UnluckyShoulder2007. It was the first time. Sure some resentment is fair but 25 years later is Esh. You’re NTA, your family is godawful. It will require that they be understanding. g. ”. My cousin married the youngest son. St YTA and a self centered little bitch. But when I came out to them they told me to tell no one because it makes them look bad. py xh sc be uu lq yn nx lp lj
